Co-parenting after a divorce or separation is a significant life change. As such, transitioning from being partners with your ex to co-parents is going to require patience, clear communication and a (hopefully, as you can’t control your ex’s approach) shared commitment to your child’s well-being.
While the challenge of transitioning from partners to co-parents can be daunting, many former romantic partners can provide an opportunity to establish a healthy and supportive environment for their children. If you’re hoping to achieve that aim but are unsure of what you can (likely) expect, consider the following.
New communication dynamics
Co-parenting will involve maintaining regular communication with your ex, even if your personal relationship is strained. The focus should ideally shift from personal issues to the shared goal of raising your child. You’ll need to coordinate schedules, discuss school events and make joint decisions about medical care, extracurricular activities and other key aspects of your child’s life. To that end, using tools like co-parenting apps or shared calendars can help streamline communication and minimize conflict.
Adjusting to a parenting schedule
When you co-parent, you’ll likely follow a court-approved parenting plan that divides time between you and your ex. This schedule may require adjustments to your daily routine and work commitments. For some, the time away from their child during the other parent’s custody period can be emotionally challenging.
On the positive side, parenting schedules can provide opportunities for personal growth. Using time away from your child to focus on self-care, hobbies and/or career development, can be helpful. Also, including virtual visitation terms in your co-parenting agreement can more effectively allow you to remain connected with your child while they are with your ex.
A new normal
Life as a co-parent will involve establishing a new normal for your family. This includes adapting to changes in routines, holidays and traditions. Should you run into challenges along the way, keep in mind that seeking personalized legal guidance and support is always an option.